pretty little rocket frenzy
by walkingdisastersharkchild
Summary: AH AU "if i left, what would you do?" "bring you home, you know that." "dammit sasuke, be a little bit more romantic." Sasuke & Sakura DEAD
1. Prologue

**Another bloody story.**

**Prompts: Blink 182, my sister's t-shirt and lack of sleep**

**Disclaimer: I really want deidara.**

**Its ah. Its au. Expect out-of-character-ness.  
**

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Prologue

We are sitting in one of the big crowded parks. It's late at night, and the fireworks have ended. People are leaving but most are staying for a little while longer.

I like the silence between us, although I do wonder how the rest of my week is going to pan out. Nothing incredibly boring, hopefully. As much as I hate to admit it, I do like a little excitement in my life. Maybe not the highlife that all the recent books and movies rave on about, but something better than the usual day-to-day of school.

And besides, whatever happens is usually caused by the female of our trio. Which makes me both cringe and hope for something _amazing_.

"So, Sakura, what do you plan on doing this weekend?"

I cursed silently. That would have been _my_ line, had I been able to open my mouth faster than – _mybestfriend _– Naruto. Stupid blonde, with a motor mouth. I really should have broken his jaw when I had the chance back in middle school. Might have taught how to keep his mouth zipped.

Pushing herself up to sit, said pink-haired girl laughed. I tilted my head to the side, watching her. I was interested too, although I wouldn't admit it aloud.

Ever.

Okay, maybe just this once.

"I agree. You do always have ingenious plans, Sakura, that somehow involve the police, you, Naruto and me on a weekend."

She laughed again, shaking her head. "That may have been once, or twice, depending on how you look at it."

"Or every weekend," I heard Naruto mutter, grinning despite what the last fieldtrip nearly cost him.

_cough_schoolscholarship_cough_

Sakura smiled, but I noticed this one didn't reach her eyes. It was odd for her mood to dim so quickly. I mean, it dimmed quickly, but that was usually when she became very, very pissed. And I am assuming she isn't pissed. She hasn't attempted to hit Naruto, which is the general indicator of her being pissed.

"Well, I hate to break it to you, but I plan on sleeping, and then rolling over and sleeping some more. You know me; I'd nap six times a day if I could."

True. She could give Shikamaru a run for his money if she tried. But her attitude would remain the same no matter how much sleep she got. Which was a pain in the ass.

So, naturally, I presumed this was a complete lie.

"Hn."

"Don't believe me, Sasuke? Tut, tut, I'm rather distressed."

I rolled my eyes and lied back down on the grass. Damn her for reading through my speech. I don't care how many years we had been friends, I was allowed to be enigmatic. I was going to get to the bottom of this.

Somehow.

"Well, in that case, Sakura, bastard, I bid you all adew." Naruto stood up, and waved as he started to walk away.

"It is pronounced _adieu_, idiot," I half-yelled at his back.

"Whatever," he shouted back, and his blonde head was lost to the streaming crowd of people in the park.

"Sasuke, you don't have to be so mean," Sakura murmured, shooting me a dirty look.

"Since when do you care if I called Naruto an idiot?"

She huffed, and her bangs flew up for a brief second. "Something has … _come up_. So I care."

"And this somehow relates to me calling Naruto an idiot?"

"Yes, because I want you two to stick together. And to not fight."

"I can't promise the latter."

"Sasuke, just shut up and listen."

She _was_ pissed. I knew it. That's why I am the genius in our trio.

Sakura sighed. "I'm leaving."

I blinked, preparing to open my mouth and yell for Naruto to come back. He was pretty much the only one who could keep us together, let's be honest. I mean, I'm antisocial, and Sakura is a sadist.

But, Sakura beat me to the punch and clamped a hand over my mouth.

"If I were to leave, and run to the ends of the earth, what would you do?"

I pulled her hand off. "I would follow you, and bring you home. You know that."

She narrowed her eyes. "Yes I know, but sometimes Sasuke, I hope for something a little more romantic."

"I'm trying to be _nicer_, Sakura, that's the closest I can get. Now, tell me _why_ you are leaving."

Sakura rocked back and forth, and I was tempted to push her over. Not that I would but the thought is tempting.

"I've been thinking that maybe I'm running out of time. I mean, we can die at any minute, you know. So, while I'm still young and healthy and still have the pin to my parents' account, I should go experience the world. Only, I'm afraid I'll get lost in it, and never return."

"Why don't you take us with you?"

She shook her head. "Sasuke, I want you to be the one to bring me home. I won't tell you when I leave, but when I do, you'll know."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean? Why can't anyone go with you? And why_ me_?"

She smiled and stood up. "Come on, genius; use that big head of yours."

And she left me.

Shit.


	2. Chapter 1

**katharine, the curse will be lifted, just you watch.**

**prompts: cobra starship, soul eater and potatoes.**

**disclaimer: i really want deidara.**

**its ah. its au. expect out-of-character-ness.**

* * *

It has been at least a month since I last saw the pinkette disappear into the celebrating crowd.

Don't get me wrong, I'm annoyed. Borderline distressed, naturally. Let one of your friends suddenly disappear and then see how it feels. You'll believe me.

But this is just one of her moods. I had to keep reminding myself that. It always is, anyway.

Last time, she left for three months to go surfing in Hawaii. Just to blow off some steam - I'm assuming - over a B on an assignment.

It was over an _assignment_, for Pete's sake.

The girl is nuts. No doubt about it.

But if I had any sense of insanity like she did, I'd probably disappear too. Become a nobody instead of a somebody. That would be great.

A little ... _frightening_, but appealing.

At least, she says that's her angle. I'm not sure if I believe her anymore.

Yeah ...

I just don't know anymore.

And now I'm lying on my bed, listening to my mum scream for me to get downstairs, and hearing my brother knock on my door. Can you see the difference between listening and _hearing_? I'm tuned into one more than the other.

Why?

Because, it's another day of school, and my pink-haired friend is missing.

"Oi, Sasuke. Mum's going to blow another casket if you don't stop moping around."

Itachi, always the subtle one. I seriously doubt if he's the genius in the family, sometimes. His bluntness must come from mum. No joke.

"Fuck off."

"Are you really that worried about that girl?"

See? So fucking blunt, he can't take a hint. Mum's like that too. Oh, _God_, I hope she doesn't know about the Sakura-situation.

Has he said something to her?

"I said, _fuck off_."

"You never said 'I said'."

And then I was throwing a baseball at him, which hit the back of my door, leaving a sizable dent that I was going to pay for later.

"Mum! He said he's not feeling well! _Again_!"

I hate that guy.

I could hear my mum complaining, and I pulled out my iPod, pushing the earphones in hard so that they would sit in my ear, because the damn things refuse to sit in my ears properly. Which is a pain in the rear end most nights.

The playlist had been changed, apparently to something that I don't even remember putting on there.

_Cobra Starship_ rang through the earphones, and all I could do was sigh.

Bitch, tampering with my iPod.

That's it, now I'm _beyond_ pissed with her.

Bad enough she messes with my phone and my computer, but the iPod is _mine_. No one touches it. No one even _looks_ at it.

(I'm not even sure people know I have one ...)

I pushed myself up and managed to get my legs working again, throwing open the door and hollering down the hallway. "Mum, I'm leaving in fifteen minutes! Don't wait up for me!"

She said something sarcastic, and I waved it off, pulling on whatever reasonable clothing I had, and stuffing my laptop into its bag. I ran my hands through my hair, trying to tame the stupid thing. I am considering getting it all cut off.

Soon, I was walking to school, shoving as much toast as possible into my mouth - attractive of me, no? - and texting Naruto.

And she said men couldn't multitask.

Shame on her.

The idiot responded with a million exclamation marks, giving me a headache at about the same degree, and the usual comment of me being a bastard. Predictable idiot.

I stepped onto the bus just as it arrived, and sat in the usual spot at the back.

And, naturally, my thoughts drifted to my missing friend.

Stupid pinkette said she'd be wandering the world. She wasn't one for geography, and no doubt had a multitude of maps with her, and satellite GPS.

I always knew she had a serious case of _wanderlust_. I just never guessed the severity of it. Or what effect it would eventually have on me.

My phone buzzed, shining with the holy light of a new text message.

(Oh, hello there, pinky, I was just thinking about you. Are you a mind-reader now?)

_Check the seat in front of you, for a route to nowhere in particular._

That didn't even make sense. Shame on her, _again_.

But, I checked the seat in front of me. Nothing out of the usual. Same thing in the same shape as everything. Ruined beyond the care of everyone else.

Permanent marker had made a permanent spot on the back of the seat in front of me though. Crisscrossing lines with about five arrows protruding from the ends seemed familiar, and I was reminded of an anime I had watched the previous night.

Which had nothing to do with the previous situation, but I couldn't help myself. I enjoyed that anime.

As I focused, the lines seemed to form words.

_No fucking way_.

I hate this chick.

I am _not_ going to France, even if my life depended on it.

Nu uh.

No way.

Ah, fuck it.

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**REVIEW!**

**please.  
**


	3. Chapter 2

**ahahahahaa. i love sasuke. his character can be toyed with, believe me.**

**(so, if he is girly in this and a little warped, its because i believe he has a little girl trapped inside of him, showing herself every so often. true facts, bro. **

**and he will forever be little-smirky-boy. not purple-ass-ribbon-guy to me.)  
**

**prompts: coca-cola, bowling and wishful thinking of france.**

**disclaimer: i really want deidara.**

**its ah. its au. expect out-of-character-ness.**

* * *

I think my hair line has started receding.

The amount of times I have run my hands through my hair this past half hour is unthinkable. I can't count the number on both my hands. And including one of my feet.

It's mainly because, I'm nervous.

_Shock horror_, Uchiha Sasuke is nervous. Who would've guessed?

(pinky would've)

Well, I don't want my mother to know that I have withdrawn an insane amount of money from the bank (I may have also _borrowed_ a credit card or two) and that instead of preparing for exams, I'm off to France for a few days.

(_huzzah_)

Yeah, I don't think it will go down well with her.

And I don't even want to think about my father's reaction.

(It would go something like: _you've disappointed the family, son, shame on you, blah blah _banned_ blah blah _shame _blah blah_ waffles)

Itachi would've laughed. Maybe I should've brought him along. Taken him away from his destructive fiancee.

... _Nah_, I hate that guy.

Naruto? I think I'd get sent off the plane, because he talks to much and waffles on about how he's going to show everyone how _fantastic _he is.

Seriously, Naruto, but a God damn cork in it and shut the _fuck _up.

Don't have enough care sometimes.

El phone decided to vibrate again, and speak of the devil and the devil shall send you a million messages.

Fuck him.

I hate everyone today. Maybe I will go sit in that corner and cut myself like everyone thinks I do.

Yeah, that's right, I _don't _cut myself.

He was asking about where in the seven seas I was.

Really now? _Really_?

I told him I was in fact not in a sea of any sort, but an airport. And for him to _STFU_!

(with only one exclamation mark, thank you very much)

Cue phone off, and boarding the plane.

I love first class. Oh, no more fat guy next to me, snoring and drooling.

I love my life.

I love _money_.

Thank God for dad.

Plugging in my iPod, I nodded off. Apparently the flight took a little over twelve hours.

I could sleep for at least eight of those.

When I woke up, my phone had miraculously turned on. It was approximately five hours from landing and I wanted to throw the thing out the window.

How dare it turn on, vibrate with messages and wake me.

The first message was of course, from pinky.

(who may have starred in a few of my dreams_ just then_)

_morning starshine. the earth says hello.  
when you land, you'll meet ... a friend of mine_  
_and i hope to every god up there that you'll be the nice guy i know you are_  
_deep down. wayy down.  
ciaoo, baybay_

I really am starting to feel an immense regret at following all those arrows.

I know that Sakura's ... social network is kind of warped, but close knit, and I've only ever met her best friend (who seriously, tried to rape me once, no joke) but I haven't bothered to dip a toe into those murky waters since then.

She doesn't mess with my friends, and I don't mess with hers.

It's how we maintained a friendship all these years. Say one bad word and BAM, bye bye pinky.

Or you could leave for a while. Like I did. But whatever floats peoples boats.

(hey, it was an exchange program to America. I came back though, after many considerations of living there until the end of high school)

Although, I could always ask Naruto about who lives in France at the moment.

After all, he's friends with my friends and Sakura's friends. Yeah, he's basically a psycho-magnet.

I mean, I'm not exactly sane at the best of times, and Sakura is way off the mark, so with that in mind, none of our friends are exactly ... sane. Borderline asylum material.

We do some pretty crazy shit.

(and this one time ... _at band camp_ ... I kid, I kid)

I text the blonde douchebag with no exclamation marks whatsoever.

He responded with enthusiasm the level of crazy, saying that the dear, sweet Hinata Hyuuga (the apple of his eye, the object of his affections) was currently residing in France for a trip.

And why the fuck was I going to France.

He then asked if I was doing the dirty with her.

I lied and said I was doing the dirty with Sakura.

(it nearly happened ... once, but he didn't need to know that)

_BASTARDDDDDDD_

Yep, I know, Naruto.

So, I text back with no apology of course, asking if he knew where Hinata was actually residing.

_France_.

No, dickface, actual residence.

His brain must've just kicked in.

_Marseille_.

Ah. That narrows it down. No sarcasm intended.

As, I had no plans of scouring the French countryside in search of Hinata (if it was Hinata I was supposed to meet).

Phone went off, plane landed within an hour, and exhaustion flooded over me.

I think I may be getting in touch with my feminine side, with the amount of thoughts I have.

(must. practice. manliness.)

_Grunt._

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**review please. yes, it's crappy and i found it funny whilst writing it, but REVIEW and i can improve.**

**true facts, bro.  
**


	4. Chapter 3

**my jaraiya headband is always going to be worn whilst writing naruto fanfiction. i've decided.**

**mainly because things get kind of pervy.**

**regardless, sorry for a late update. i have a multitude of excuses, but i don't think anyone is in the mood for it.**

**prompts: a little birdie, a new computer and money.**

**disclaimer: i really want deidara.**

**it's ah. it's au. Expect out-of-character-ness.**

**

* * *

**

I wanted to punch a hole in something that wouldn't break my hand, just cause a slight bruising, maybe. Something manly, you know how it is.

Mainly because, waiting at the airport is not the most entertaining thing I have ever done in my life. Or any life beforehand for that matter. And, I have done some pretty low key, uneventful, boring things in my life. Don't doubt me on that.

But this _almost_ takes the cake. So close to this other time ... which happened in jail. But, not going there right now. Bigger problems ...

Like the seat next to me, which never remains vacant for more than a couple of minutes. I think there may be a group of girls who are taking turns in sitting next to me. Oh. Here comes another one. Hmm, she doesn't look to bad. Wait, no, she just winked at me. Bleh.

But seriously, where is Naruto's lady friend, for Pete's Sake?

Two hours ago pinky text me with the whole '_don't, sweetie, she'll be there_'.

Bull fucking shit.

That was _two hours ago_!

Fairly sure that Sakura is lying to me again. Just leading me on as usual. I hope she didn't slip anything in my bags that may alert authorities, because I know that'll be _way_ too entertaining for her.

I hate this. Why can't something just go my way? For once. Well, another time, but still.

Although, major question right now is: Why did _I _have to look for Sakura?

Why me? And, I seriously don't want to hear from other people that it's because we lurve each other. No. I may be partial to her, but just no. Definitely not partial to love._  
_

I huffed again, uncrossing my arms for a second, stretching. The girl next to me started eyeing me off (again? really?), and I wanted to just get up and leave. This one was starting to creep me out a little. I think she just undid some buttons on her shirt.

(please leave me alone. please, ask someone else if you want to join the mile high club today)

Suddenly, despite being a little more than creeped out, I actually had a mental picture of Hinata. Yep, lame of me, a bit slow on the uptake, yadada, waffles.

I looked around the airport again, trying to find a haircut that resembled the backside of a bird.

(I know mine isn't any better. Hence the growing-it-the-fuck-out phase of my life)

Now, I had never seen Hinata in person, which may be a contributing factor as to why she may not find me. I've only heard countless stories of how fantastic she is.

And, I'm not talking about her performance in bed. Although, Naruto is apparently banned from the family home.

_I wonder why …_

On the topic of haircuts with my inner voice suddenly made me worry.

(not the inner voice part, I've grown to just ignore it until vital parts of my life)

The last photograph of Hinata I had seen was from a few years ago. When we were maybe thirteen years old, maybe a little earlier. And, since she is a friend of Sakura's and Naruto's cupcake, but I hadn't paid much attention to her.

Like I said, separate friends, not much to do about it.

Whipping out my phone (because I'm cool like that) I texted the blonde about what Hinata may look like.

He texted back just as quickly (you know, I must have really good reception) and, all in capital letters, said I am not to perve on Hinata's abnormally large chest.

…

_She has a large chest?_

I looked around, seeing as this was basically the only clue to finding her.

Seeing as females were worried about their weight these days (no offence), I had noticed that breast size had greatly decreased across the board. Yes, I did look at that at times. It's an appealing aspect of a woman.

Sure enough, a large breasted woman with a kind of indigo colour head of hair was standing by the entrance. At least I'm pretty sure it was indigo.

Apparently only one in ten million people can see indigo. So, right now, it's indigo, because I'm unsure if it is.

Regardless, I stood, ignoring the girl next to me who just slipped a piece of paper in my pocket oh so subtly, and walked towards Hinata.

Or, the-girl-who-I-though-was-Hinata.

Whatever floats your boat.

As I got closer, she looked at me. Oh yeah, it was her.

Her and her cousin, Neji, or something weird like that, had these freaky eyes, which were like a pale lavender-slash-white. With no pupils. At all. I don't know where Neji stares sometimes, because his irises kind of melt into the rest of his eyes, and first time I saw him, I mistook him for a blind guy.

True story.

But, at least it looked like she was looking somewhere. Me, mainly, but surrounding area as well.

Oh, my god, I can't handle this pupil-less situation. I'm going to constantly make reference to it one way or another.

(_mole, mole ... MOLEY __MOLEY MOLEY__ MOLEY MOLEY__!_)

Farrkkk. I'm doomed.


End file.
